


Bathrooms and Fast Food

by 0Alexias0



Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: First Meetings, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-02 10:57:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14543238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0Alexias0/pseuds/0Alexias0
Summary: Never have Pete thought he would run into a bathroom with McDonald's and meeting him but here he is.Or, why you shouldn’t anger a flock of pigeons.(AKA the really weird First Meeting AU)





	Bathrooms and Fast Food

 It was a warm summer afternoon. The bees were buzzing and the birds were chirping. A little squirrel was nibbling on an acorn on the sidewalk.

Only for it to scatter when a pair of legs stomped through.

Pete ran down the street. In his hands a fresh bag of McDonald’s. Behind him a cluster fuck of angry pigeons.

Yeah, long story.

As Pete ran for his life, clutching the fast food paper bag, he started to wonder how he got himself in this situation.

See, it all started this morning. Pete was just minding his own business when his good ol’ pal Joe Trohman bursts in saying “hey Pete let’s start a band”. And so they did. They were playing some dope covers of rock songs and stuff when Joe got a little too pumped up and accidentally threw his guitar out the window. Unfortunately, said guitar just happens to land on some un-expecting pigeon. When Pete and Joe peaked out the window and saw the bird glaring at them, Joe immediately pointed to Pete and said “it was him!” Pete just rolls his eyes and told him to get the guitar.

Skip a few hours later, Pete was strolling down the side walk with a Starbucks cup filled with peanut butter cappuccino. And then he saw a pigeon, eerily seeming to stare at him. Pete just shrugged and continued walking. Then he saw two more pigeons, hanging on the cable lines. He turned and saw three more. Then five. Then eight. Then ten.

Pete realized he’s surrounded by an army of grey avians, each one glaring at him with those black beady eyes.

He heard a flap of wings behind him. Turning, he saw a pigeon, the very same pigeon that was squished by Joe’s guitar, staring at him. A moment of silence passed before the pigeon screamed a bloody “BA-KWAK!” and Pete knew it was a war cry. Spinning on his heels he attempted to sprint – and then collided with some random guy. He spilled his peanut butter cappuccino all over the guy’s shirt but ignored it. Managing a haste “sorry”, he scrambled away, the pigeons pursuing him.

And the McDonald's, you ask? Half way down the street, Pete risked a glance to his back (the pigeons were still chasing him). And when he looked forward again, he was already face to face with _another_ random guy, one who has a huge forehead carrying a bag of McDonald's. The two gracelessly fell to the ground, and between Pete being frantic of getting up, he unknowingly grabbed the bag and took it with him. He only realized what he was carrying when he heard forehead guy shouting “Yo what the fuck man” behind him. But he knew better than to stop.

And thus how he got here. Man. Pete’s life is weird.

A very inconveniently placed bucket made him trip and Pete stumbled. A quick glance showed the mad birds now closer than ever. Pete yelped and blindly staggered into the closest building. Running through the hall, he saw the sign ‘bathroom’ and burst in without a second thought. He dove for the nearest hall and locked it. He heard the pigeon flock flying through the hallway, but no sounds seem to indicate them going inside the bathroom. Pete let out a relived sigh and steadied his breath, finding how tired he was.

“Uhm…hi?”

Pete froze. Slowly looking up, he was greeted by the sight of a boy in a fedora. A very _cute_ boy in a fedora.

Fedora boy raised an eyebrow. “Uh, hello? I said ‘hi’.”

Pete blinked. “Oh… _Oh_. Hi!” You’re cute. “Er, how are you?”

“I’m good, thanks.” There was an awkward silence. “So…can I ask why you’re in my toilet stall?” He gulped. “And why you’re staring at me?”

Pete realized he was staring. Shaking his head, he recollected himself. “Oh, sorry, this is probably rude of me.” He moved in the crammed stall to open the door slightly, but a flash of feathers passed his vision and Pete jumped back, re-locking the stall.

“Yeah, uhm, ‘bout that…can I stay here? ...For a bit?”

Fedora Boy gave him a (cute) confused look. “Sure…”

Pete let out a thankful breath. The boy looked down to the bag in his hand. “Ooh, is that McDonald's?”

Oh, Pete nearly forgot about it. “Yeah.”

A stomach rumble resonated through the bathroom and Fedora Boy blushed. “I- er- I haven’t eaten today. Sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay.” Pete’s words were already out before he knew it. He reached inside the bag. “Here, you can have this if you want.”

“Really? Are you su-” His eyes lit up at the sight of a burger. “Cheese burger, my favorite!”

Pete watched the Fedora Boy munch on the burger, an innocent pleasant smile playing on his lips. Oh wow he’s adorable.

“You’re adorable.”

The boy looked up, mouth full. “Hm?”

“I mean, uh, what’s your name?”

Fedora Boy gulped down and gave him a smile. “Patrick. My name’s Patrick.”

“Hey, Patrcik,” Pete said. “I’m Pete.”

“Nice to meet you, Pete,” Patrick said, holding the burger. “Sorry our meeting couldn’t be anymore,” he looked around the toilet, “formal.”

Pete chuckled, pulling out a carton of French fries. “No biggie. Besides, this is my fault.”

“What were you running away from, anyways?”

Pete winced. “Long story.”

Patrick nodded, biting down on his burger while Pete munched on his fries. He decided to start a conversation. “So, what’s your hobby?”

“My hobby? Well, I like singing.”

“Really?” Pete lit up. “Hey, my friend and I are starting a band. You can be our singer!”

Patrick looked surprised and Pete realized he was beyond rushing things. “I- I mean- If you- I don’t-“

“Sure, why not?” he giggled. 

Pete blushed like mad. How does one form such cute giggles? He shook his head a little. Anyways. “I think it’s safe to come out now, there’s no sign of the angry pigeons.”

“Angry pigeons? You were chased by pigeons?” Patrick raised his brow.

“Yes.”

“You’re a strange man, Pete.”

“Says the guy who wears a fedora to the bathroom.”

Patrick laughed and so did Pete. It was cut short, however, when Pete noticed he couldn’t open the door.

“Pete? What’s wrong?” Patrick asked, peering from his back.

“Nothing! It’s just that,” he rattled the knob hard, “I may have,” he tried harder, “jammed it a lil’.” It didn’t budge. “Crap.”

“Oh, um…” Patrick was still pressed to his back, and suddenly Pete felt how small the stall really is. He turned away hoping Patrick didn’t see him blush.

“Maybe if I-” He tried ramming the door with his shoulder, but without any momentum, it barely did anything. And now his shoulder hurt. “Ow.”

“What if we try pushing it together?” Patrick suggested. Sure, they can try that.

“Okay, so in the count of three, we try ramming it together,” said Pete.

Patrick nodded and Pete started to countdown. “3…2…1…” They lunged forwards as best as they can in the tight space. The door flew open and Pete landed hard with his back on the floor. With Patrick. On top of him.

Pete felt his head spin. The first thing he saw was a pair of blue eyes. Light blue eyes. Eyes the color of the sky with hints of pastel baby blue. They’re gorgeous. Pete could stare at them forever. He’s totally not in love.

“Hi,” he squeaked, chest pressed by the weight on top of him.

“Hi,” the owner of those eyes, Patrick, whispered back.

They may have stayed like that longer than necessary.

Patrick shook his head and scrambled up. “I’m _so_ _sorry_ , are you alright?”

“M'fine.” Pete waved him off, pulling himself up. Both their faces were still blushing as red as a tomato. “So, uh, you wanna come to my house? It’s pretty close from here and we can talk about the band thing.”

“Yeah, sure. Let’s go, then.”

On their way back to Pete’s apartment, he found out a lot about Patrick. First, he now knows that Patrick has been a singer since he was young, meaning he’d be great for the band. Second, Patrick told him that he can also play the drums, which was even better. Pete now also knows that Patrick likes pancakes. But beside the point.

When Pete entered his room, he was greeted by the sight of Joe lounging at his couch. Pete’s not surprised - they’ve been friends for so long, Joe basically lives here – but what did catch his attention, though, is the stranger sitting across him.

Joe was in the middle of a conversation. “-and I was thinking something like Fall Guys or- Oh, hey Pete!”

But Pete ignored him, his eyes not moving from the oddly familiar stranger.

“Oh, by the way, meet this dude!” Joe continued. “His name’s Andy. Met him yesterday. Said he can play drums so I think he’d be great for our band.”

The man, Andy, looked up and his eyes met Pete’s. And this is when Pete saw that Andy had a rather large stain on his shirt. Pete recognized it as peanut butter cappuccino. Shit.

“Hey,” Andy said, in a voice much lighter than expected, “aren’t you that guy who spilled-”

“Whoops, whaddaya know, I gotta go! C’mon Patrick!” Without thinking, Pete grabbed Patrick’s hand and sprinted out the room and to the streets.

…Only to be greeted with the pigeon cluster fuck. They stared. Pete and Patrick stared back. “Oh for the love of-” “BA-KWAK!”

The two dashed down the street. Pete only realizing just then that they were still holding hands. He looked back, expecting Patrick to have a confused, scared, or maybe mad face. But instead, he found the ray of sunshine laughing hysterically as the birds chase after them.

Pete smiled. This is definitely not what he had in mind when it comes to meeting a new friend. He’s pretty certain that meeting new friends doesn’t typically involve McDonald's, a bathroom stall, and an army of vengeful pigeons, only to hold the new friend’s hand as they’re running away from their impending doom. But then again, who was Pete to complain?

As they ran down the street, Pete realized that he couldn’t think of a better way to meet Patrick.

Pete’s life is weird. He’s not denying it.

Patrick’s laughter can be heard from behind him and Pete grinned.

Okay, maybe he’s a _little_ in love.

**Author's Note:**

> By the way this [ video of Patrick ](https://youtu.be/z4WtSIPRZBk)only has like one million views and I think everyone needs to see it.


End file.
